This is a copy of a document that has been forwarded through
several mailing lists. I've made small corrections to the
grammar, without changing the meaning.
--- Start forwarded message ---
It is well worth reading through this chunk of AA Comes of Age for
the remarkable comments at the bottom — don't miss them.
This was fwded from the gso list (to which it was fwded from an AA member), a
list with open archives available to the public:
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS COMES OF AGE pg.100f
One day at Charlie Towns' hospital, Charlie beckoned me into his
office for one of his Dutch-uncle talks. "Look here, Bill," said
he, "I've got a hunch that this A.A. business of yours is someday
going to fill Madison Square Garden. Now I am not a religious man and
you must know that I was mighty skeptical of this business when it
first came in here. Silkworth really scared me by his co-operation
with you. But that is all changed. I believe in you people. Your
methods are going to work." And he said, "Look, Bill, don't you see
you're getting the bad end of this deal? You are starving to death,
and your wife is working at that store [She worked there until spring
1939]. All around you, these drunks are getting well and making
money, but you're giving this work full time, and still you're broke.
It isn't fair."
Charlie fished in his desk and came up with an old financial
statement. Handing it to me, he continued, "This shows the kind of
money this hospital used to make back in the 1930's. Thousands of
dollars a month. It should be doing just as well now, and it would
— if only you'd help it. So why don't you move your work in here? I'll
give you an office, a decent drawing account, and a very healthy
slice of the profits. What I propose is perfectly ethical. You can
become a lay therapist, and more successful than anybody in the
business."
I was bowled over. There were a few twinges of conscience
until I saw how really ethical Charlie's proposal was. There was
nothing wrong whatever with becoming a lay therapist. I thought of
Lois coming home exhausted from the department store each day, only
to cook a supper for a houseful of drunks who were not paying board.
I thought of the large sum of money I still owed my Wall Street
creditors. I thought of some of my alcoholic friends who were making
as much money as they ever did. Why shouldn't I do as well as they?
Although I asked Charlie for a little time to consider it, my own
mind was about made up. Going back to Brooklyn on the subway, I had a
flash of seeming divine guidance. It was only a single sentence, but
it was most convincing. In fact, it came right out of the Bible. A
voice kept saying to me, "The laborer is worthy of his hire." At home
[182 Clinton Street, NYC] I found Lois cooking as usual, while three
drunks looked hungrily on from the kitchen door. I drew her aside and
told her the glorious news. She looked interested, but not as excited
as I thought she should be.
It was meeting night. Although few of the alcoholics we boarded
seemed to get sober, some others had. With their wives, they crowded
into our downstairs parlor. At once I burst into the story of my
opportunity. I never shall forget their impassive faces and the
steady gazes they focused on me. With waning enthusiasm, my story
trailed off to the end. There was a long silence.
Almost timidly, one of my friends began to speak. "We know how hard
up you are, Bill," he said. "It bothers us a lot. We've often
wondered what we might do about it. But I think I speak for everyone
here when I say that what you now propose bothers us an awful lot
more." The speaker's voice grew more confident. "Don't you realize,"
he went on, "that you can never become a professional? As generous as
Charlie has been to us, don't you see that we can't tie this thing up
with his hospital or any other? You tell us that Charlie's proposal
is ethical. Sure, it's ethical. But what we've got won't run on
ethics only; it has to be better. Sure, Charlie's idea is good, but
it isn't good enough. This is a matter of life and death, Bill, and
nothing but the very best will do." My friends looked at me
challengingly as their spokesman continued. "Bill, haven't you often
said right here in this meeting that sometimes the good is the enemy
of the best? Well, this is a plain case of it. You can't do this
thing to us."
Thus spoke the group conscience. The group was right and I was wrong;
the voice on the subway was not the voice of God. Here was the true
voice welling up out of my friends. I listened and — thank God — I
obeyed.
-------end quote
This little story is very spiritual. We should adhere to its lesson
and distinguish the message from the messenger. There is reason to
believe that the end of the story is fabricated and historically
false. Bill did not obey.
We know from Chapter 1 in the Big Book that Bill was frequently a lay
therapist at the Charles B. Towns Hospital.
We know from the above story that Bill was offered money.
We know from other sources that he campaigned for paid AA
missionaries (with himself as the chief missionary).
$7,989 (more than $100,000 in year 2000 dollars) was collected in
advance for printing the book. But when it was to go to the printer in March,
1939, the $2,414.71 needed to pay Cornwall Press was not available, and "all
were broke" and "we had no money to pay the printer".
Guess where it went! http://aagso.org/aaws/aacoa11f.htm
[ See local edited, annotated, and expanded version:
orange-aacoa.html ]
There is a letter in the AAWS archives (earmarked "For eyes only") from
Bill to a friend in Texas asking him for money to buy Bill a new car.
Bill goes on saying something to the extent "If this damn AA can't
pay me well enough I'll have to look for another BUSINESS TO FEED MY
NEEDS." Such an attitude speaks for itself.
A well known, trustworthy AA archivist had access many years ago and
held this letter in hand, but was unable to obtain a copy. Because of
such lack of "hardcopy evidence" I have to omit his name here. It is
for the sake of his security. Sorry to say that, but nowadays AAWS is
pretty hostile against members airing unwanted truth.
Bill held the opinion "I made these guys sober. They have to pay my
way."
Bill was an ardent follower of Dale Carnegie's courses, "How to
influence people", which he attended together with Lois back then.
Thus Bill was intelligent enough to wrap his opinion in nice words to
get it down the throats of others.
He used to say WE instead of ME.
He used to say "A.A. has saved these men and their
families," instead of "I, Bill Wilson, saved these
men and their families."
He used to say PAY FOR OUR OFFICE instead of PAY FOR MY LIVING.
He had the habit of hiding behind others by saying things like
"Miss Hock and I" or "Dr. Bob and I."
For instance, in a MEMORANDUM TO THE BOARD OF TRUSTEES OF THE
ALCOHOLIC FOUNDATION in early 1941, Bill wrote:
"Many of us are
beginning to feel that Alcoholics Anonymous ought to stand on its own
feet, certainly so far as central office expenses are concerned. It
is probable that more than 1500 of our 2000 members are now employed.
A.A. has saved these men and their families an average of at least a
thousand dollars a year each, let alone misery and ultimate ruin. In
short, our total membership is going to be one million — even two
million dollars better off this year because of A.A. Most of us
appreciate these facts of our recovery, and I am sure that when the
small though acute needs of our central office are made clear, the
groups will lend a hand. In fact it is beginning to look as though
they must if we are to carry on."
